Well heart burn and e-mails from sweet friends have beckoned me at 4:00 a.m. this morning to finally sit down and write an update. I am sorry I have been so bad about this. I know that I get so anxious when I haven't heard from someone or seen an update in a while but when it comes to me I don't think about it. I was forced to find a better balance between my "blog" time and actually getting some stuff done for my family, but it's also come at the price of not letting my prayer warriors know what is going on with me and also not being able to reach out to new people who may be struggling and keeping in touch with those who have traveled the road with me. Know that there is not a day that goes by that I do not pray over all of Mary Grace's sweet friends and their families and what is going on with them now. Also know that if you have reached out to me and I haven't returned the touch, that you are in my heart and in my prayers.
It is so incredibly heart breaking when I hear of a new person who has or will have to let go of their precious baby. And I can not imagine not having this engine to connect and heal with people who truly understand what you are going through, even if grieving it differently. And even having those dedicated prayer warriors that have simply been led to you by God with no common connection is a wonderful reminder of how God provides us with what we need to get through the days (thank you Laurie!!).
Well.....my scheduled date to have Baby Summons is 4/9/09!! So two weeks and I will have baby #4 in my arms. I have changed the office to a baby room, a storage room to an office and have painted the walls a nice neutral yellow. Other than that the room is still pretty bare. I haven't really been able to get myself to buy anything in preparation which makes my mind go crazy at times wondering why? Is there something really wrong? Is something preparing me for heart ache? Everything has been going really well at my doctor's visits....no signs of anything wrong....no "markers" - yikes I still hate that word. The baby is moving around wonderfully and I enjoy every kick and roll. I day dream about coming home Easter morning with this new precious baby and it brings pure joy to my heart. But...there is always the thought of not having sweet Mary Grace to be waiting behind the doors to welcome her brother or sister home along with Kailey and Allison. She is always with me but the void is always there in every thought, every action, every preparation.....but without that void, there wouldn't have been her. So...I will take it with thanksgiving in my heart!!
99 out of 100 people have said this baby is a boy...so we will soon see. It's funny my one friend said "you are all belly this time your hips haven't spread - it's for sure a boy" and I say, "well I would hope they wouldn't spread anymore...they never went back to normal after Mary Grace". I went to a movie the other night and I thought I will soon have to buy two seats if this baby doesn't come soon:) People ask do you feel different? Well considering I was 35 lbs heavier getting pregnant this time, older and have been pregnant for 2 years.....You betcha I feel different.....ha ha - so does that mean a boy? We will see. I covet your prayers for a safe healthy entrance for this precious baby. I ask that you continue to pray for me to have the peace I need to fully enjoy all that this baby brings to me and my family. I already feel your prayers covering me as I have gotten several e-mails asking for an update. Thank you for continuing to pray and to check on me. I promise to give an update as soon as sweet baby Summons enters this world.
So...you ask am I ready? I have a car seat, bassinet and the hospital will surely have diapers....so yes, I am so ready!!:)
God's Blessing to all my sweet bloggers!!
Please also say a prayer for Kristy Bolte and the sweet baby girl in her tummy today. http://babybolte.blogspot.com/
P.S. For those of you who watched the Extreme Home Makeover...thank you for your sweet comments. I was so proud of my Mary Grace....yet another reminder of what my sweet girl accomplished!!
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12 comments:
Hi Kim,
It is so good to see an update from you first thing this morning! Two weeks, WOW, I am so excited for you and your family. April 9th will be a sweet day as you meet this baby and find out who he/she is. I am praying for you and for a wonderful birth day for this Easter Baby:) Asking God for His peace and joy to be all over you.
Yes, I am praying so hard for Kristy and her baby girl today and asking God to make everything good and bring peace to Kristy. You know this road, you know the pain of uncertainty. I know I have to pray for all of you. I love you and am so excited to hear when your baby gets here:)
Love and Huge Hugs, Laurie
Ok, I am so relieved. Thank you so much for the update. I check at least daily hoping to find something that says you/your family are ok. I will continue to pray for all of you as you enter this time. Especially for peace in all that you encounter. Mary Grace is so in your heart and will be with you throughout this special time. I am sure she is already the guardian of baby #4.
Tell the girls Annabel sends hugs to them and will be checking in. P.S. don't know how you have time to blog with all the rearranging.
Loving you here!
So Hope came up and told me she really misses Miller Grace, just about the time I started reading your blog. I told her I do, too, and then she asked what your baby's name is. (She was looking at pictures of Mary Grace.) I told her about Mary Grace and how she is in Heaven with Miller Grace and that now your two big girls, just like Hope and Mattie, are waiting on a new baby. She grinned SO big and thinks that's SO cool. She can't believe your baby is a surprise, but said she bets it's a boy! Good luck, sweet Kim. We cannot wait until that perfect baby is home where he or she belongs. You know Mary Grace will never look away. :)
Thanks so much for the update. I think of you so often. You are such an inspiration to me. I can't wait for news of a safe delivery for you and a beautiful, healthy baby. Don't worry over the nursery. Things always seem to get done. I think and pray for you, Chris, and the girls every day.
All my love,
Christy
Love you Kim! Can't wait to see pictures of baby Summons #4! Praying for you daily! Thank you so much for your prayers!
We are so excited for you guys. Looking forward to meeting your new little one. Glad to hear you are doing well. I think about you often and in my prayers.
SO glad to see the update. I lost two children before my daughter was born 33 years ago - she had one daughter in 2004, then in 2007 a daughter was stillborn. Like you, she became pregnant again rather quickly, and I almost laughed at your post because it sounded so much like her world about 5 months ago! "Pregnant for two years, heartburn, a carseat and a bassinet and we can get the rest at Target when we KNOW" And the fear. After her little girl was stillborn in 2007, she found a blog of someone who had been through similar circumstances, and that was so much comfort for her. And she told me about it, and I found it to be comfort for me too! And I am SO thankful that all of you wherever you are can give comfort to each other - feel each other's pain. And each other's joy! Her little GIRL (LOL - we thought boy too!) was born December 4, 2008 - and we are thankful. And begging God for your safe delivery of a healthy baby! God bless.
Oh, so good to read all this. I am glad to have a specific day to be praying for, too.
Love you, sweet Kim.
Kim,
Thanks for the update - April 9. Wow - it seems like it has come so quickly. We are counting the days with you. I'm so thrilled to meet Baby Summons. Something to look forward to in April - what a blessing.
Hugs, love and continued prayers to you.
So glad to read your update...and so excited about the new arrival! Prayers are with you as you approach this blessed event!
I, too, watched Extreme Makeover & loved seeing your sweet family on tv. The photo of Mary Grace was precious. Good luck with everything with the new baby -- and I will go out on a limb and say girl!! :)
Blessings,
UNC NICU RN
Thank you for the update! :-)
Blessings,
Cxx
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