Higher Ground

Well, I can’t believe it’s 2008! 2007 is kind of a blur right now and I am so uncertain about what 2008 will be. I am thankful for so much in my life, yet feel so let down as well. It’s hard for me to complain when I do feel so blessed….blessed first to have a wonderful Savior, an awesome husband, to be a Mother of three precious girls, a wonderful family. But….I am in a season of unrest. God knows I love him and praise him for everything….but my Heavenly Father also knows me….and he knows I feel let down, scared, disappointed, hurt, angry and the list could go on and on. I do not think he would expect me not to feel those things. He created in Mothers such a strong connection and love for her children and I do not think that he wouldn’t understand our emotions when one of our children is hurt, in need or not going to be with us for long. So I do find comfort in knowing that he weeps for me, his child that is hurting.

I have read over some old posts that I have printed out from Copeland’s Mommy and Maddox’s Mommy, and others that help me daily and it reminds me again….these children have and will continue to serve a higher purpose than we could ever know. They have ministered and have shared Jesus and will touch more people in their sweet short lives than most people who are here for a long lifetime. I again, want to praise Jesus for everyone who has been willing to share their story and heartache so that I could somehow find my way through this. Thank you for sharing Jesus to the world and thank you for allowing God to work through you.

I wanted to give everyone an update. I had my weekly Dr. visit yesterday and everything looked the same (which is a good thing I think). The Dr. said that he wanted me to come back next week (Thursday the 10th) and that he may decide to induce me on Friday or Saturday. So…I could meet Mary Grace in a week! He may hold off until the 17th but expressed fear of waiting too much longer and does not want to take any chances. Please pray that she will turn from the breach position, that my body will be more ready for induction and that the Doctor and nurses will have the wisdom they need to move forward and help us to make the right decisions. I have had a pretty down day, I am scared…not only of the unknown but the known. I do not want to be without my sweet Mary Grace and I fear that time is coming. I fear I will not come back from this. So…I know so many of you are praying for these fears and I ask that you continue to do so. I need you all and praise God for each of you. Continue to pray for my family, my girls and my friends who are going through this type of thing with me. I have been singing an old hymn to myself today and want to share the words with you…………

I’m pressing on the upward way,New heights I’m gaining every day;Still praying as I onward bound,“Lord, plant my feet on higher ground.”

Lord, lift me up and let me stand,By faith, on heaven’s table land,A higher plane than I have found;Lord, plant my feet on higher ground.

My heart has no desire to stayWhere doubts arise and fears dismay;Though some may dwell where those abound,My prayer, my aim, is higher ground.
I want to live above the world,Though Satan’s darts at me are hurled;For faith has caught the joyful sound,The song of saints on higher ground.
I want to scale the utmost height,And catch a gleam of glory bright;But still I’ll pray till heaven I’ve found,“Lord, plant my feet on higher ground.”

Lord, lift me up and let me stand,By faith, on heaven’s table land,A higher plane than I have found;Lord, plant my feet on higher ground.